The Butterfly Effect

At church on sunday it was about the Butterfly Effect. How he related to our servie was basically...speak the word of the lord and good things will happen.

"God has crafted your wings to create a weather pattern of glory"

I know that I speak the word of the Lord often. I do this to help me get through my day and maybe it will help someone else. Since I have turned my life over to the Lord, my life has changed in so many ways. Our marriage is stronger, our baby is coming, our financial situation is great to the point we are able to afford our adoption with out any loans! I think that is what I am most excited about. Our relationship with our friends have become stronger also. I hope that I have helped some of you through your dark days, that is what I feel my calling is...to help others understand why this is happening to us. Our long wait for our babies to come home. You must TRUST HIM. I know I say that but please TRUST HIM. If you are TTC...TRUST HIM...there are reasons why it is taking long for you...TRUST HIM!

Today on my way to work I saw a neighbor frined of mine...Here is the story...Her older sister and Jeff went to high school together, this girl married a guy on our street. We became friends. They were married last June, started TTC and got pregnant right away. I saw her today...she looks great...she has 3 weeks to go and the baby will be here. I remember walking last summer and seeing her and talking to her about our hopes to adopt. That was right around the time they started TTC. It is funny how things happen. So here we are waiting the arrival of our baby and so is she. I think her baby will be here before ours...she is due June 12th. It was so great if our kids are around the same age. We have no small children on the street . They are all between the ages of 4 and 8...so for my kids that is too much of an age difference IMO. So when I was driving away...I felt a little sad...I will admit to it. I was a little sad. Sad that she is going to give birth to her baby. Something that I do long for...I will admit to that too. I long for the feeling of the baby again. I loved that feeling...it was amazing. I also long to hold OUR baby when he.she arrives via adoption. What a huge gift that will be. I have come to grips with the fact that my life is far more important then being selfish and getting pregnant because I want a Bio baby. A baby is a baby...it donesn't matter if it is of your blood or not. So that is where we stand...those are my feelings...love them or don't that is me. Hugs and Blessings